Build my life...

So I am going to pose a hypothetical here.  Say there is this girl (and it could be a guy) who is alone more often than she chooses.  She has a ton of friends and family but sometimes late at night in the solitude of her home, she often finds herself sitting on the couch watching girly love driven movies, crying about failed relationships, hoping one day her life will fit somewhere in that fairy tale picture she created for herself.  She goes out with friends, she enjoys company of her family (ALOT), but something is missing (I'll come back to this...).

OK where do I start?  Fairy tales only exist in books. Our lives were created by the Lord Almighty and have a purpose.  What we choose to do with them is so on us.  So how do we get real?  Love does exist, it can and it will happen for you.  God knows every single detail about your life and he knows what he has in store for you.  So why do we get in the way?

I found this little quote on Pinterest and I loved it.

      My princess,
             Don't you believe that I know who you will marry and that I am capable of leading you to
             right person?
             Can you also believe that I am God of all creation. I know you better than you know
             yourself.
             I am perfectly able to bring this person into your life in my own time, in my own way,
             and I don't need your help.
      Love, God.

This was awesome.  I can imagine having a face time call with God and being told "you need to stop meddling in my work.  You need to let me do my thing."  I asked earlier why we get in the way.  Well the world is a scary place and we see happy couples all around us and its natural to want to have that also. But the world is worldy....a lot of times it isn't Godly.

It's so easy to like the attention from a guy ( or girl if you are a guy reading this) when we don't have that in our lives. The world makes it so easy to fall into something like that.  We crave it.  We like being liked.  We like being valued. It's easy to get wrapped up in conversations that probably won't transpire into anything, leaving us once again, sad and alone.  So why do we continue to do that?  Do we like to be sad?  LOL!! I know I don't.  We need to focus on the one person who will never ever forget us...GOD. See He is what is missing!!! He won't leave us. He is there when we are laying on the couch, crying, watching those stupid movies, or even having those conversations we know we shouldn't be having.

This week I had a wonderful conversation with a friend because I was a little down in the dumps. As we floated in her pool talking about relationships and such she made a comment that resonated so clear with me.  She said something along the lines of "find someone who is chasing God as much as you are."  If its meant to be it won't pass us. What are we chasing in that fairy tale we dream about and think about all the time? Do we think we are missing out on happiness? Do we honestly need the attention that much? Why are we so worried about it?  Why does it consume us? Matthew 6:25-27 is perfect. "I tell you, do not worry about your life..."

I have learned what you chase is what you become.  I know I want to chase God every day with all the energy that I have.  I want to find someone who chases after the same thing.  I want to stay right where I am until I find someone who loves God as much as I do.  And I guess, well I may have to wait a while.  And well that's ok. I am going to "build my life upon his love because its a firm foundation. And I am going to put my trust in him alone, and not be shaken. " I want to teach my son to wait and chase God first.  That it's ok to be alone until you find that special person.

But when I do find that Love, it will be so worth it.  It will be a front porch sitting, dancing in the rain, snowball throwing, laughing until I cry, fishing on a boat in the middle of the lake or laying on the couch watching a love story kind of love. But most importantly, it will be God's design and it can't be torn apart.

Aha...

Ever had one of those moments when you knew you were in a spiral headed no where? Where you were on the wrong track if even on a track at all? Ever lied to everyone around by saying you were fine, good, or ok? Ever had thoughts that you shouldn't? Ever used your time in a way you knew was not pleasing to the Lord?   Ever had that one moment where you hit the ground and bounced so hard it knocked the sense into ya? Well I think we all have those moments, even us as Christians.  It could a certain circumstance or something from the past but know it isn't the end of the world.  Today I read Romans 3:23 that says "we all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God."  How do you get back up?  How do you recover?  How do you get back on track?

One of the hardest things for me to do is to get real with God. I mean I'm not telling him anything he doesn't already know.  But we have to get right with him. We have to come clean from the very behavior that threw us off track.  The peace that comes after talking to God is so good and so worth it! So cry and pour your heart out to God but get right with him.  Then ask for forgiveness. He needs to cleanse us and wash the sin from us and ultimately forgive us.  Think about David.  He kinda blew it with God but then got his life right.  He didn't make any deals with God, he didn't try to make his sin seem really small.  He changed his life and asked for forgiveness.  All sin big or small needs to be dealt with.  And then we really have to turn away from that behavior.  We have to own it.  God will forgive us and allow us a fresh start.  This start will guard our hearts and we won't want anything to do with that sin.

As Christians we can use our past transgressions to help others. We can have him use us and our sin to glorify Him, if we just let him. God loves us. He wants to forgive us and take our sin from us.  He wants to cleanse us and make us whole.  I guess I need to work on allowing him to work him me and truly experience his Love and power in my life.  I need a fresh start in God's grace.

Father, forgive me where I have failed you. Forgive me where I  have failed or upset others.  Forgive me for poor time management with time with you Lord and time with family.  I have used my time to seek gratification in the world and not you Lord.  Please cleanse me and make me new in your eyes.  Make me a vessel for you Lord and show others your kindness and compassion. Minimize any consequence from my sin Lord.  Allow for relationships to be rebuilt to honor you. Thank you Jesus for eye opening experiences and friends you have placed in my life.  I love you Jesus. Amen.